Capitaan dildo arrescate!
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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