its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize