It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize