school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Randomize
