She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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