So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
