I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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