Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
