My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Randomize
