I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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