Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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