what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
