hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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