Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
jump out the window naked night went bad
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