you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
