i just wanna soil my oats bro
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
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