so that wasnt chicken after all
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
