at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I just found puke in my bra..
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize