I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
