Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize