I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
