he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
