i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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