you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize