Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize