there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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