Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
