jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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