If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize