whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
so much tequila, so little girl.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
