if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
