my mouth tastes like poor choices
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
