they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
