i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I'm both gender and math confused
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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