Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
