were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I haven't been this sober since birth.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Randomize
