Me. At least after what I've been through.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize