Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
