I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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