Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Just invented taco cereal.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
