She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
