So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
