You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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