I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
