That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she smelled like a LAN party
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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