I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
