Only a mothe r could love this liver
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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