pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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