I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
My dick has a subreddit
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize