I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
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