East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize