did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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