So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
